Monday, 18 May 2015

Fish Are Friends, Not Food: Helping Your Child Transition from Middle School to High School

Deja is a 13 year old from Houston, TX. She likes to write and swim. She wants to be a psychologist to help teens she can relate to.

Parents, children, teens, middle school, high school, changes, growing upWhen you are little all you dream of is growing up, and when you’re older you wish time would freeze. I always thought high school would be something different… It’s just a bigger dose of everything. Coming into high school I had high expectations, but no fear. That all changed when I walked into the huge building. You know when you go into a mall and you think that the world is over populated? That’s how I feel every day. I haven’t experienced bullying or anything like that. I finally got used to the marathon I have to walk every day to get from class to class.  Parents, your teens will probably be excited, and act like everything’s fine for the first few months. When they start realizing the drama that comes with high school, so will you. Attitudes and behaviors will change. That’s for any kid. There are some simple ways to help your teen transition from Middle School to high school.

Remind them about who they are.

Your teen is going to have a lot of friends going in opposite directions, because they want to try new things. They will most likely not know what to do or where to go (social wise). This will and can be frustrating.  Remind them that they are their own person. Stress and drama is a big deal in a teen’s life, and it won’t ever go away. Make sure that they know that you are there even when their friends aren’t. All they will want is someone to listen.

Remind them to make their OWN choices.

Peer pressure is a big thing in high school and your teen probably will not tell you if it is happening until it’s too late. Let them know that you respect any decision they make in life, and that you will be there for them no matter what. When we know we have someone who will be there with us through thick and thin, we tend to open up more. That doesn’t mean you’re saying they can say yes to drugs, sex, or alcohol. It just means simply stating you are there if they don’t know what to do, so y’all can talk.

Girls:  Whenever you’re starting high school, you want to be involved with everything and everyone. You want to get the hot guys and be friend with the right people. Getting involved in all this can be VERY stressful. Don’t let the glam on TV trick you. It’s not all rainbows and butterflies. It’s hard to fit in, especially when you are a freshman. People take advantage of you. When I say this, I mean mostly boys. Take it from a Fish who knows, they don’t mean anything they say. Don’t fall for tricks because it won’t work. Focus on your friends, homecoming freshman year, sports, school, and your future! You have 3 more years to worry about all that other stuff. This is the most important year of your High School life.

Boys: Starting High school you’re going to want to be popular as well. You’re going to want to get all the girls and have all the guys think you’re awesome. News Flash: that probably won’t happen. The more you “try” to act cool, the more you will be pushed away. Be yourself, focus on sports and school. That will make you cool and respected. Your friends are your friends and you will know who the real ones are really quickly.  Don’t be scared of high school. It’s nothing different than just a bigger dose of what you’ve had in middle school. Drama is more real and important, and people are more judgmental.

Parents: Remember, don’t scare your teens about high school. Make them look forward to it. Don’t tell them your “Back when I was in high school…” stories either. By now they know your mistakes; they’ll know to make their own. Being open and trusting you are something you will definitely need to build during this time. Listen to them, because when all their friends disappear they will know right here to come to. The best line to use is, “It’s you and me against the world Kid.”