5 Ways to Turn Couch Potatoes into Responsible Teens

Vatsala is a 15-year-old from Amritsar, India. She enjoys listening to music, reading books, writing, doodling and her favorite subjects are English and Math because she wants to be an Actuary. 

For parents, there was a time when there was no television around. There was a time for them when there were not 500 channels available, not to mention the different shows aired on them. Now the time has come where television is available in every household, in every public place and even on cell phones. The “Idiot Box” has become teens’ best friend, and no matter how much parents keep screaming at them to stop, it doesn’t seem to affect them at all. Here are some ways through which parents can save their screaming for something else and stop their teenagers from being a couch potato.

Keep them Busy
Keep your teens busy by assigning them chores to do, or have them take out the old board games from the closet and play with them. Don’t let their mind wander to the world of Television, let it stay in the present.
Use Music as an Alternative
Music is a popular past time among teens and if you feel that your teenager watches way too much television, let music come to your rescue. Encourage your teen to listen to music when they have nothing else to do. Music soothes the mind and it is sometimes is a very good way to relax one’s mind. But don’t even let it go to their heads.
Spend time with your teen
One way from stopping your teen from watching a lot of Television is to spend time with them. Some teens watch television just to deal with loneliness. Don’t ever let them feel that way. Talk to them, pay attention to them.
Knock on the door of their Imagination
Get your teens to read books. Reading books open the door to their imagination and it increases their vocabulary too. If your teen hasn’t picked up the habit of reading, try keeping them busy by narrating stories to them or by playing imaginative games with them.

Keep A Firm Hand
Assign Television watching hours to them and have a firm hand. Parents’ hearts melt very fast when nagged often. Keep the rules in operation and switch off the Television when having meals. Let them enjoy the family time without a Drama!
Teens are at a very delicate age and if not handled with care, it can have very adverse consequences. Television is an important part of a teenager’s life .The teenagers get so engrossed in the Television Shows that they get angry with them, get happy with them and even start crying with them. It makes them forget the reality. No wonder Parents want their teens to watch less TV!

Planking and Other Pointless Teen Trends

Gabriele is a 17-year-old aspiring writer from Jacksonville, FL.  She loves the wit of Charles Dickens, the smell of sharpened pencils, and the charm of coffee shops. She lives her life by a Benjamin Franklin quote: “If you would not be forgotten as soon as you are dead, either write the things worth reading or do the things worth writing.”

You’re lying down. Face down. Your hands are touching your sides and you are completely still. You’ve done this before in various locations; restaurants, open fields, libraries, schools, parks. You have a designated photographer—someone who can handle peculiar looks from spectators. The photographer takes your picture, laughs, and documents it all on Facebook.

You’re Planking. And you love it.

But wait. Now planking is “so two months ago.”  You take up a new trend: Owling. This requires you to put in a little more effort, crouching in a perched position and dramatically looking off into the distance.

This, you conclude, is also fun.

However owling is “so two weeks ago” and Batting seems to be more amusing. So you try that. You hang upside down and fold your arms in a V-shape on your waist. Yes. This is fun.

Though Planking has been around since the late 90s, it recently exploded among American teenagers and inspired related games such as Owling and Batting.  While a seemingly pointless trend, the movement has sparked a great deal of controversy. Some people think that the trend is extremely dangerous, especially in regards to the casualties from Planking in dangerous places. Others believe the trend originated from slavery, saying that the slaves were forced to lie down on “plank” beds. Most just find Planking a pointless trend started by a couple of bored kids.

So what makes this trend so fascinating? Why do so many people participate?

Well why do we participate in anything? Think about it. Every year a new trend emerges, and every year thousands of followers join in. Why? People like the idea of having a common ground. Something mutual they can share, laugh about, cry about, vent about, and argue about. Whether you play a part in the action of the trend or not, you somehow contribute simply by forming an opinion about it.

Let’s take a look at some other pointless trends from our generations. Do you remember any? Did you participate? If you did, ask yourself why. Maybe then you’ll understand the hype.

70s: Pet Rocks, Afro, Bellbottoms, Disco, “Groovy,” Rocky Horror Picture Show, Sea Monkeys, Mood Rings

80s: Mechanical Bulls, Valley Girls, Line Dances (“Achy Breaky Heart”), Cow Tipping, Panty Raids, Toga Parties

90s: the Macarena, Slap Bracelets, Pacifiers, “Psych!,” Beanie Babies, Tamagotchis, Saved by the Bell, Push Pops/Ring Pops

00s: Flash Mobs, Silly Bandz, Saggy Pants, Reality TV, Napoleon Dynamite, Zombies, Mentos and Coke

Though we’d like to fancy ourselves anti-conformists, we’ve all fallen victim of following a trend at some point in our lives. As long as the trend your teen is participating in is legal, handled with safety and not harming anyone, try not to judge them too harshly.

Because we’ve all been there.  MC Hammer pants anyone?

How I Deal with Nervous Anxiety Disorder

Jasmine is a 16 year old from East Brunswick New Jersey. She enjoys reading poetry and literature and the performing arts. Jasmine plans to major in journalism in college.

“Why can’t I stop worrying? Why won’t this list of worries ever end?” was the recurring thought that manifested itself in my mind like a virus as I grew up. As young as 10 years old, I asked myself sadly why I could not feel happy. I was so innocent, but so burdened by the weight of my worries. And as a sensitive individual, I naturally absorbed everyone else’ responsibilities; I possessed the mindset of a 40 year old. I worried about helping to put food on the table when my father lost his job. I agonized about getting straight As, even when they didn’t count for anything in middle school. I tormented myself about whether that essay was perfect enough, or whether I should have spent less money on myself. I panicked about my friends and whether they still loved me. I cried easily and despised being so vulnerable. Although I am (still) an incredibly outgoing person who loves to smile, there was this constant, semi-subconscious negativity that threatened my emotional and mental stability.

In 7th grade, I began to bite.

Strangely enough, I bit my actual hand, and not the fingernails…I am a rather eccentric case of anxiety, I suppose. I gnawed on my hands, as I would food. My hand found its way to my mouth repeatedly, until it became an automatic reflex to stress. My friends didn’t quite understand. Most of them were happy and lighthearted, who recoiled in disgust as I showed them the calluses which had formed on my fingers. They were hard, red, ugly, swollen areas. Even my sister shuddered as she touched the callus, and angrily announced that if I continued this habit, no one would ever hold my hand. Some slapped me and yelled at me when I bit, others pleaded with me to stop.

 I pleaded with myself, but this action of biting had become addictive and had spiraled out of control from a sometimes-habit to an obsession. I bit and bit, until I split the flesh and my fingers bled. For the past four years, I have struggled to stop biting. It’s hard to fathom how much damage that I’ve inflicted on myself and it pains me to know I have no one to blame but myself. In 10th grade, I began to tear out my eyebrows with my hands. All of these… nearly irrepressible obsessions have become a part of me, and reflect the intense anxiety and nervousness which I feel underneath the smile.

Although I am still fighting the war against these feelings, I have matured emotionally and this has made me a happier and more stable person, despite the continued habits. Some of my friends, who have finally reached the same point of anxiety as I did 5 years ago, ask me how I deal with it. Upon reflection, I see that I took numerous actions in order to counteract this disorder. Although I was first forced to see a therapist by my guidance counselor, I found that I liked talking about my feelings to a someone professionally trained to understand and advise me.

My therapist introduced me to new concepts, and helped me to understand the neurotic and psychological aspect of my actions and emotions. She instilled into me confidence and self-esteem. Some fear therapy because of what therapy is associated with: mentally damaged, insane, “retarded” people. They are afraid to admit they need help. However, I would strongly advise therapy to anyone who is struggling with the same problem as I am. I also write poetry and simple essays to release buildups of emotion. It is an amazing way to uncage your emotions without harming yourself and anyone else, and in retrospect, many of the works I have created are beautiful and inspire me to keep writing.

Whenever I consider doing something rash, I talk to my friends, who have always reasoned with me and proved to me how much they love and care about my future. With this confidence in myself and in the unconditional love of the people around me, as well as therapy, poetry and the simple solution of time, I have become a happier and healthier girl, ready to take on the world.

Trust me: you are not alone. As for parents, I can only tell them to continually comfort and support their children, as they should be doing already. I constantly seek the approval of my parents, and without it, I often feel miserable. Harsh words have harsh impact on a sensitive and dependent child—and parents must understand this aspect and this responsibility. Parents should emphasize that their love is unconditional. However, there are a number of different types of nervous anxiety disorder. At other times, parents may simply need to offer a shoulder to cry on or a reassuring hug or smile.

The most important advice I have to give is to simply be there for your children. There is nothing like the let-down of a parent who is “too busy” or who tells their child to just “get over it”. Such a response is incredibly insensitive and ignorant of the way someone’s mind can work, the way someone can be manipulated into extreme agitation by their subconscious. Parents should show their children a consistent love and faith that they can overcome any obstacle preventing success and well-being. These are only first but most vital steps to equip a child properly for a happy and healthy life journey.

Time Management Tips For Teens & Their Parents

Michael Costigan is a 17 – year-old from Orange County, CA. He is a social entrepreneur, public speaker, and truly enjoys helping other’s better understand teen related issues.

Teens struggle with time management because it’s not until the beginning of adulthood that they have to really map out their own future and create schedules and goals that correspond to a successful alignment of both their ambitions and abilities.

The transition into this new way of thinking can, however, be made easier through some general best practices that both teens and their parents alike can benefit from.

1. 1.  Understand that Time Management should really be Self Management.

No matter what we do, there will always be 24 hours in each day. It’s not so much how we look at each hour, as it is how we look at what we are doing with each hour. Time management can become in and of itself a time waster. During school the bell schedule manages students’ time. At work, it’s a manager or series of zoning rules for lunches and breaks. Time is effectively managed for you, rather than you yourself managing your time. For teens, this then creates a problem. After school hours, weekends, and vacations all create voids of third-party time management. It is very important, then, that we set up structure for ourselves so that we adhere to our own pre-set time schedules. Learning how to empower oneself to stick to a schedule despite no one else holding you accountable is one of the most valuable, but most challenging things to do. Often this is the case because there is no one else to crack down on you or hold you to your duties but yourself.

1. 2.  Tackle the most uncomfortable or challenging tasks first each day.

I have had multiple mentors all tell me the same thing. Each day when you wake up, set out to do the things first that you least want to do. You will need to train yourself to do this, to the point where you embrace the uncomfortable thoughts so much so that they become second nature and part of a habitual routine for yourself. At first this is extremely challenging, but once you are able to master it, or at least make it a frequented pattern, it can be extremely satisfying because the weight of what ever unfavorable things you needed to do will no longer follow you around the entire day hanging over your head. 

1. 3.  Prioritize like crazy.

Imagine that you were an ER doctor or police officer – you would have to prioritize on the fly no matter what, wouldn’t you? Prioritization is essential to self-management because without it you can find yourself putting off highly important tasks in exchange for more trivial or easier ones. Over time the consequences of inaction start to mount and you will find yourself even more underwater than you already were. If you learn to quickly assign something a level of importance and then act on the list of things you must accomplish successfully, you will be forever grateful to yourself and others will admire you for your quick and decisive action. So, start setting milestones for school projects, work projects, even things that you need to do around the house. This way it will be more obvious to you and clearer to others where your are on a particular task, it makes it so much easier to track your process for yourself and for those who expect you to finish the task.

1. 4.  Set routines and daily patterns that produce results.

This is one I am still struggling with. Ideally, you want to set a schedule so that you are waking up and going to sleep around much the same time each day so that your body adjusts and gives you the maximum performance that it can. Additionally, you should schedule in time for things specific to different tasks. For example, every Friday morning at 8 AM might be the day you want to wash the car, and every Wed at 7 PM might be date night. It doesn’t matter what it is, but I find that even when you set aside time for the simplest of tasks it is easier to cut through them and you don’t feel as though there is a whole list of things to you do because the specific time block you have has an actual actionable item assigned to it. This can actually help you have more free time. For example, if you decide Sundays are your relaxation day, you can schedule your entire week so that you don’t find yourself having to run around on Sunday finishing last minute things or things that you could’ve done earlier in the week but didn’t because you spent the time idling or doing something that wasn’t aligned with your priorities.

Now, obviously some of these things are very idealistic. Wouldn’t we all want to be this organized and productive? Even if you can adopt parts of these strategies, though, you will find yourself in a better position moving forward – hopefully less stressed and getting more things done!

“TH1RTEEN R3ASONS WHY” by Jay Asher: Suicide Warning Signs and What We Can Do to Save More Lives

Catherine is a 15 year-old from California. She loves reading novels and her favorite subject is English.

“I guess that’s the point of it all. No one knows for certain how much of an impact they have on the lives of other people. Often we have no clue.” –Hannah Baker (from the novelTH1RTEEN R3ASONS WHY)

Have you ever wondered what sort of impact you have the potential to make on someone’s life? Think about your high school days. Is there anything you regret, something you wish you could have done differently? Recently, I read a book called, Thirteen Reasons Why, by Jay Asher. It’s about a girl named Hannah who committed suicide, yet before her death she left a series of tapes behind (thirteen, in fact) explaining her death. These tapes were sent around to a list of people, specifically those who played a role in her fatal decision. My friends and I absolutely loved this book. Although it was a rather depressing read, it taught me at least one thing: the way we choose to act towards others has the ability to be life-changing, for not only ourselves, but also those around us.

Suicide is a serious subject, yet not often discussed in depth, at least in my experience. Did you know that suicide is the third leading cause of death in 15-24 year olds, and the third leading cause of death in 10-14 year olds? Suicide is a difficult topic to discuss; yet it’s important to know about it. Mainly, why would someone want to end their life in the first place, and what are the warning signs? According to the Ohio State University Medical Center, teens attempt suicide due to major changes such as depression, confusion, body changes, uncertainty, overwhelming pressure, and changes in thinking. In Hannah’s case, she decided to commit suicide due to the rumors spread about her at school, affecting how everyone treated her. Teens may also consider suicide as a result of consecutive overwhelming or upsetting events, such as moving to a new area, parents getting a divorce, etc. Suicide may seem like the only solution to their problems.

In Thirteen Reasons Why, Hannah committed suicide as a result of her own, and her classmates’ actions. It all started out with a false rumor, claiming that Hannah was something of a slut. When Hannah went to school, the rumor hung over her, something she couldn’t shake off. Her classmates treated her differently, and even her friends began to treat her differently. Her reputation consumed her life, and eventually it began to tear her down. Some kids pranked her, made snarky remarks, and toyed around with her feelings. They all thought it was just fun and games, when in reality their bullying would result in something far greater. At one point in the story, the antagonist, Clay, was with Hannah at a party. But then she started crying, and demanded that he leave. Clay reluctantly agreed, but this proved to be a dire mistake. While listening to the tapes Hannah left behind, Clay realized all the warning signs were right in front of them, but at the time, everyone was too caught up in their own lives to notice the one that needed help the most. Many don’t recognize the warning sign until it’s too late. Then, everyone asks, “What could we have done? What should we have done?” But at that point, it doesn’t matter, because they’re already gone. So what are the warning signs of someone thinking about suicide?

Some are extremely subtle, so one may have to keep a close eye on the person’s actions and even choice of words.

• In Thirteen Reasons Why, one of the warning signs I learned is a sudden change in the person’s appearance. Did they get a haircut? Does it seem like they no longer care about their appearance, by wearing shabbier clothing? Usually, one changes their appearance in the hopes that someone will notice them.
• A suicidal person will withdraw from family and friends, and no longer participate in once-favorite activities. Are they reclusive, and tend to be alone more often and for longer periods of time?
• They may also have changes in sleeping or eating habits.
• Are they giving away prized possessions, or promising them to family members and friends? In Thirteen Reasons Why, Hannah gave away her bike to Tony without a reason, a sign missed by him.
• Do they say things like, “I wish I were dead,” or “I wish I could disappear forever?”
• Do they speak positively about death, or are they romanticizing dying? (Ex. “If I died, people might love me more.”)

If you notice any of these warning signs in your child, make sure you to talk to them about what’s troubling them. If your child notices a classmate at school who seems suicidal, tell them to seek out the help of a trusted adult, such as the school counselor, parent, or teacher. The sooner the teen gets help, the better chance they have of being saved from a horrific fate. For more information about teen suicide, and what you can do visit http://www.teensuicide.us/.

Remember that everyone has the potential to make a difference in someone’s life, both good and bad. Unfortunately for the character Hannah, her classmates made a negative impact on her life. Yet this book helped me realize that all our actions have tremendous power that influences not only us, but also everyone else. So all in all, be careful of what you say or do, and make sure your child does the same because you never know what may happen as a result.

Teenage Depression: The Best Ways to Help Someone Deal With It

Conor is a 17-year-old from Boston, MA and enjoys sports, history and music and he can’t wait to correspond with you.

Sometimes it can be hard to discern between a teenager’s expected fluctuating behavior and a teenager who is undergoing a serious and severe wave of depression. For a parent, the difference between these two behaviors may be even more difficult to recognize, as it is fairly common for many teenagers to hide personal and emotional experiences from their parents. In general, when a teen is suffering from depression, he or she will tend to bottle up all emotions due to a belief that it is impossible to communicate the specific emotions to a friend or family. At most, the victim of depression will reach out to one, maybe two friends who have recognized the symptoms of depression and have reached out to try to comfort the victim.

As an example, a close friend of mine, let’s call him person “A” for the purposes of the story, has recently been forced to deal with the oncoming divorce of his parents after both of his brothers have left home for college. “A” has always been someone who has had some fairly unconventional emotional streaks in the past and has always been somewhat quirky, regarding his normal interactions with friends. That is why, for the past couple months, when he displayed, what could be considered as unusual patterns of behavior, my friends and I didn’t think anything of it. However, this pattern of behavior reached a scary of climax about a month ago when “A” left during the middle of a gathering by himself, to walk home in the cold and snow, without telling anyone or answering his phone. While none of us knew what to do immediately, it became clear that our friend’s behavior was not typical and that he was certainly suffering from serious depression, and we made the important decision to reach out to him and let him know that it was important for him to know that he could confide in us whenever he wanted to get something off of his chest.

Though this story may not seem incredibly dangerous or serious, it is clear to my friends and I that we got lucky in realizing the symptoms of depression and talking to “A” before he completely isolated himself from others and may have harmed himself as a means of coping with his depression. And for anyone who knows or thinks that may know someone who is seriously depressed, the importance of recognizing and addressing the symptoms become increasingly important. So, here are a few common symptoms of teenage depression:

• Decline in grades/school performance: An early and important indicator of teen depression is if a teen stops doing homework and, as a result, begins to show much less care in his or her school performance.
• Loss of appetite: Usually, if a teenager stops eating on a regular basis, especially a teen who tends to be a very good eater, is eating less meals a day and/or eating less food at every meal.
• Loss of contact with friends: It is important to understand that this does not mean a change in who a teenager may spend time with. But if a teen who tends to be a fairly social person, starts to refuse to go out and instead prefers to shut themselves in their room for hours at a time.
• Increase use of recreational drugs and/or alcohol: This may be the easiest symptom to recognize, especially if the teen does not have a history of drug or alcohol abuse.
• Increase in violent behavior: Typically, when a teenager is depressed, the depression will take the form of anger and aggression and will tend to be aimed at parents, siblings and possibly even friends.

Lastly, the best way for a parent to make sure that your teenager does not suffer from depression would be to aim at the roots; in other words, to fight the causes of depression. Most of the time, teen depression results from a sense of loneliness and hopelessness, and thus it is important for a parent to constantly show affection toward a teenager, even when this affection may not be deserved. Tragically, it seems as if parents do not often realize this simple concept until it becomes too late and depression has already consumed their teenager.

I Just Don’t Know What To Do: 5 Coping Skills For Teens

Onyeka is a 16 year old from Orange Park, FL. She loves running, meeting new people, and reading. Onyeka loves making friendship bracelets, she one day hopes to become an entrepreneur and sports medicine physician.

 “Help! I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place!” At first one may think you literally mean that you are in physical danger and need help, but what this commonly used phrase means is that you’re stuck in a situation where it seems that you lose regardless of what decision you choose, hence, “a rock and a hard place”. This phrase is used for extreme situations, not just your everyday pit for pat “problems”, as in whether to order the fish or chicken or wear striped or solid. No, this is for the cases in which the consequence of your choice may impact your life or someone else’s profoundly. Usually, in these situations, a number of bad decisions led you to one ultimate predicament. Parents, you have many stresses that cause you to feel like this, like, your job, money, and TEENS! I know as teens we deal with issues where we just don’t know what to do. Though many teen issues are self-inflicted, due to numerous bad choices, we need to know there is a way to get through the hardship and know we chose the right decision without losing our hair in the process.

Through my 16 years of life I have come across two types of situations: Impulsive and Impending. An impulsive situation is the case where the quickest way to get out of a rough problem is to choose the, you guessed it, impulsive choice. These are usually the problems that seem to come out of the blue. “Well, what’s wrong with this?” you may ask. The problem with this is that most people’s impulse is the wrong choice. Just last summer, I found myself in a similar situation. I was driving with my permit with someone under 21 (bad choice #1) when I decided I wanted to practice my parking skills. As I turned to enter the parking spot, my sister urged me to stop and reverse because I was obviously too close to the car parallel to the parking spot. I didn’t listen (bad choice #2) and rear-ended the car. We fled the scene thinking we were home free, but to our astonishment a police officer arrived at our door 45 minutes later. Though I knew I should have stayed at the scene with a little urging, I actually let someone else’s impulsive decision ruin my driving record.

Impending situations are the opposite of Impulsive. These are the problems you know you’ll have to face sometime in the future, such as for parents dealing with rebellious teens and their actions. How do you deal with your teen that just told you they’re pregnant or got someone else pregnant? Do you kick them out, force them to give the kid up, have an abortion? What if they committed a crime? Flunk out of school? Teens, you know you make wrong decisions all the time like running from the cops, and hanging out with the wrong crowd, though many of them peer pressure related, you know you have to face your consequences one day, whether it’s a court date or facing an aggravated teacher. The day will come, but will you be ready?

Now you have an impossible situation and you just don’t know what to do. Whether its impulsive or impending, here’s a start to dealing with your problem:

1.    Breathe

Relax, calm down. It’s easy to make impulsive decisions in a hyped up state, but if you calm down and clear your head the right choice will come to you.

2.    Don’t procrastinate

If you start weighing your options now and consider the pros and cons, you’re more likely to make the right choice.

3.    Think long term

Think, can this decision come back to bite me in the future? Choose the decision to fix your problem, not make it worse.

4.    Ask for advice

If you can, ask for help. Ask a friend, teacher, parent that’ll give you clear unbiased answers. Your judgment may be clouded and two heads are always better than one.

5.    Stay positive

Be optimistic! Hope for the best results, and be prepared for the worst. Don’t let the situation overcome you; it can possibly make the situation worse.

In life we will run into tough situations- it’s inevitable. We can’t control that, but what we can control is how we deal with them, we can run or we can face them head on. Though the consequences may be harsh, remember that when you stop and think, the right decision will come to you.